Loss of libido in women: causes and solutions

Addressing loss of libido in women in a simple, straightforward, and precise way: that's the whole point of this article! In the lines below, you'll find key and useful information if loss of libido is a topic you want to learn more about and take action on!

• “I feel less like it”

• “I feel too tired”

• “I feel disconnected from my body.”

• “That’s not my priority.”

• “The less I do it, the less I want to do it.”

If any of these phrases sound familiar, know that you are not alone! There are causes for this, but also solutions !

Is a decrease in libido normal?

Loss of libido in women is far more common than we think, yet it's still rarely discussed. It's shrouded in silence, guilt, misconceptions, and sexist expectations. As a result, a woman with decreased desire is often seen as doubting herself, her femininity, and her relationship… when what she really needs is to understand what's happening in her body !

At Puissante, we speak the truth. Because a decrease in sexual desire is neither inevitable nor shameful. It's a hormonal, emotional, and contextual reality that deserves our full attention, compassion, and expertise!

Furthermore, it's worth noting that not all women necessarily "suffer" from this decrease in libido . This reduction or loss of desire can also be experienced positively and with perspective by some.

Here, there is no injunction to find anything, provided that one is coping well with the situation.
Simply answers to questions, reliable information and solutions if needed.

In short, if you are experiencing a decrease/loss of libido and you are coping well with it: everything is OK!
If you are experiencing a decrease/loss of libido and are struggling with this situation, don't worry, because we have some advice and a good number of solutions.

A brief introduction to how libido works

Yes, it's normal to experience less or no sexual desire at all . Yes, it's normal for libido to fluctuate depending on life stages, events, hormones, or overall health. And so, no, it's not "abnormal" to not feel like it!
Female desire is not an "on/off" switch that malfunctions as soon as it decreases. It is a living, sensitive, complex emotion/feeling, often impacted by many invisible factors: stress , fatigue, mental load, alcohol, physical activity , hormones, intimate health, past relationships, contraception , couple dynamics , or even your relationship with yourself!

Libido in women is cyclical, contextual, and multifactorial. Contrary to some misconceptions, desire doesn't operate on command , nor as an immediate impulse. It can sometimes arise "in response" to physical, visual, bodily, or even imagined stimulation, and sometimes it doesn't respond at all!

It can take time to build, requiring security, trust, foreplay, or a conducive atmosphere. That's why if you're stressed, exhausted, angry, or don't feel desirable, there's a good chance your libido won't make an appearance .

But the good news is: you can act on it and nothing is ever set in stone when it comes to libido.

What are the common causes of loss of libido in women?

After laying out some basic principles, let us review in more detail the most frequent causes of a decrease or disappearance of desire in women.

1. Hormones

Hormonal fluctuations play a major role. Decreased estrogen, decreased testosterone, postpartum hormonal imbalance , menopause , hormonal contraception (pill, IUDs, etc.)—these variations can directly impact arousal, vaginal lubrication , desire, and sexual pleasure.

💬 “After giving birth, I was lost. My body had changed, I no longer wanted sex, and I felt guilty. I discovered it was hormonal, and it set me free.” – Sophie, 36

2. Mental workload and stress

Mental load can be a real libido killer . Between work, personal life, children, emotional burdens, anxiety, chronic fatigue… there's often little energy left for desire. Chronic stress raises cortisol , a hormone that inhibits the production of dopamine and estrogen, and therefore, desire.

3. The couple relationship

A lack of communication , tension, lack of trust, a rigid routine, an imbalance of pleasure between partners, or painful sexual intercourse can gradually extinguish the flame in one of the two partners.
Here, we keep in mind that loss of libido is often a signal, not a problem in itself.

4. Intimate health and pain

Vaginal dryness , infection, pain during intercourse, chronic yeast infection, or undiagnosed vaginismus can make sex uncomfortable or even painful. The result? The brain anticipates discomfort, and libido disappears as a protective mechanism.
If you are going through menopause , this vicious cycle can become even more entrenched!

5. Contraception

As mentioned earlier in the "Hormones" section, we'll delve a little deeper into contraception , as it can be a significant cause of decreased libido! Certain hormonal methods can impact female libido . In particular, the contraceptive pill , which affects sex hormones, can lead to a drop in testosterone, thus affecting desire. The same is true for some hormonal IUDs.

6. Mental health

Low mood, anxiety, depression, mental fatigue, low self-esteem… all these factors can negatively impact pleasure and desire . Libido is closely linked to your self-image, your body image, and your sensuality. Don't neglect this important aspect, which also influences many other areas of your life!

What are the signs of a decreased libido in women?

• Absence or decrease in desire, arousal

• Less interest in sexual intercourse or caressing

• Decreased frequency or pleasure of sex

• Difficulty reaching orgasm

• Irritation, pain or dryness during intercourse

• Gradual disinterest in the couple's sex life

• A feeling of distance or indifference towards sexuality
  
  

Important reminder: not wanting sex isn't necessarily a problem. The real issue is: is it weighing you down ? Do you want to rediscover your libido , to understand, to reconnect?
There is nothing to "improve" if you do not feel the desire or the need to do so!

What are the solutions to regain your libido?

1. Identify the causes

First and foremost, it's essential to consult a healthcare professional to assess the situation. A gynecologist, a sex therapist, or even a sympathetic general practitioner can help you identify the physiological, hormonal, or psychological causes of your loss of libido . This is especially important if you are pregnant, postpartum, or menopausal!
This also helps to rule out any causes that might stem from other problems, a disorder, a dysfunction or a disease.

The idea: to start directly on the right track and not miss anything.
Your health is a priority!

2. Explore natural solutions 🌿

Symptoms do not necessarily mean problems and therefore medication!
At Puissante, we believe in the power of gentle, natural, intimate solutions tailored to women:

• The Libido & Natural Lubrication Supplement A herbal and natural extract treatment formulated to reignite desire, improve vaginal lubrication , support hormones, and boost sexual pleasure. Made in France, tested by women, and validated by real-life feedback, this treatment is the perfect option for those who want concrete and rapid results while choosing a respectful and ethical solution!

• Herbal remedies (maca, ginseng, tribulus, saffron): certain plants have a recognized effect on energy, stress, and libido. As herbal teas, they can be an easy option to incorporate into your routine!

• Essential oils (ylang-ylang, ginger) in massage or diffusion to stimulate sensuality, awaken desire, create an atmosphere.
  
  

Health disclaimer : Always seek medical advice from your doctor before starting any treatment, especially if you are undergoing hormonal or drug therapy, are already taking other medication, or are pregnant or breastfeeding! The aim here is to avoid any additional problems or the onset of other disorders.

3. Taking care of yourself (really)

Here are some tips to really take care of yourself:

• reconnect with your body and practice gentle physical activity (dance, yoga, self-massage, breathing exercises, hot baths),

• sleep more and better (sleep plays a crucial role in sex hormones)

• reduce alcohol consumption and rebalance your diet.

• reduce stress through gentle techniques (meditation, walking, writing),

• reconnect with your sensuality without performance anxiety ( caressing yourself , looking at yourself, rediscovering yourself),

• read or listen to inspiring content about female sexuality

• Let go of guilt, don't convince yourself that you have a problem. Thought has incredible power!

 4. Working on communication within the couple

Talking about your decreased libido with your partner is already a step towards regaining control. Explain what you're feeling, what you need, what scares you. Build a pressure-free intimacy with your partner, with moments of tenderness, caresses, play, and shared silences. Because sexuality isn't just about "making love," it's also about listening, consent, and taking things slowly .
Don't hesitate to reassure your partner if they feel blamed or "at fault." It's a real phenomenon: some women and men have a pleasure/desire > performance relationship that needs to be deconstructed!

5. Grandma's tips for boosting libido

Our grandmothers have always had their little secrets for awakening desire ! Among the best known:

• Sipping a ginger or cinnamon infusion can stimulate blood circulation.

• Adding honey and almonds to your diet can nourish sexual energy.

• or you could opt for dark chocolate for its natural aphrodisiac effect.

Some also recommend a warm bath with essential oils (ylang-ylang, lavender) to relieve stress and awaken sensuality . Simple, gentle, and accessible little rituals that help reconnect with your body and your pleasure.

6. Re-establish sexual relations or moments of intimacy, with conditions

Do you feel like we're stating the obvious or that this contradicts what we've been saying from the beginning? Be careful, this point should be approached with caution!
A real observation is that: the less sex one has, the less desire one feels to have sex .

Sometimes, a good way to rekindle desire, lust, and pleasure is to reintroduce sexual stimulation, under certain conditions:

• Never force anything ; consent is the foundation of pleasure and therefore desire! Single, in an open relationship, in a couple, married… Sexual relations must stem from a sincere and mutual desire on the part of ALL participants. Forcing yourself to please someone is already an abuse!

• Do not set yourself a goal: to enjoy yourself, to last "so long", to please the other person.

• Stop all sexual activity if it becomes uncomfortable, painful, or psychologically or physically difficult!

If you want to try to reignite sexual excitement, masturbation can be a very effective and stress-free option: you decide when it starts, what direction it takes, when it ends, and you control everything from A to Z!

Using vibrators for women to stimulate sexual arousal and create pleasure is also a valuable tool you can rely on. Coco is a benchmark in the world of female vibrators : it's generally praised for its effectiveness. If you're unsure where to start, know that Coco is a safe, reliable option, designed by women for women!

And if the interest is really not there: leave it alone, you can try again next time.

Sexual activity can take many forms! The couple > foreplay > penetration format is only a partial and incomplete representation, keep that in mind.

Quick FAQ on loss of libido in women

Does libido ever return?

Yes. Often, slowly, differently. Libido isn't a straight line. It evolves with the seasons of life. Sometimes it needs rest. From time to time, it needs a trigger. Occasionally, it returns unexpectedly, in a moment of relaxation, intimacy, or reconnection.

The key takeaway? It can't be forced. It needs to be nurtured. Don't be in too much of a hurry, and above all, ease the pressure to encourage its return. By following the advice above, there's no reason why it shouldn't reappear!

When should you consult a doctor in case of loss of libido?

From the moment it concerns you, raises questions, or even worries you! Loss of libido can be linked to many factors, caused by many things… your doctor is there to take a neutral and caring look at you and your state of health at a given time.

He or she will be able to make connections, rule out a problem, or give you valuable advice! Don't hesitate to seek help and don't wait to consult a doctor.
Treatments and natural solutions exist for many disorders.

Never self-diagnose based solely on observation of your symptoms, do not take any medication, treatment of any kind, hormonal treatments or even dietary supplements simultaneously and without the advice of your doctor.

The lack of medical follow-up can have negative consequences on your health and well-being!

In summary:

• Loss of libido in women is common, multifactorial, and never inevitable.

• It can be linked to hormones, stress, contraception, fatigue, couple relationship or intimate health.

• Solutions exist : medical, natural, relational, emotional.

• Talking about it is liberating . Women and men can experience a decrease in libido. It's normal, natural, and it happens! Talk about it.
  The body responds to listening. Desire is reborn in kindness.
  
  

At Puissante, we encourage you to listen to yourself, to get informed, to dare to talk about it.

Because your libido doesn't define your worth. But understanding it is already a step towards taking care of yourself.
Be patient, understanding, and loving with yourself, and everything will be alright.