What is aftercare? Taking care of others and yourself after love

Who says  sexual intercourse says foreplay, act itself and maybe orgasm. We have  a pretty clear idea of what it's like to experience an intimate moment together. However, we tend to  forget what happens next . Aftercare is one of the most important stages of a relationship , but still too few people know what it is.

What is aftercare?

Coming from the BDSM environment, where play sessions can lead participants into areas of great physical and emotional vulnerability, aftercare is the act of taking care after sexual intercourse .

When the body and mind are inflamed, we produce  a powerful cocktail of hormones . Excitement transforms our physiology, stimulates our imagination and strengthens the fusion with our partner. Sometimes it even propels us into another dimension. How to find your way back to Earth? 🚀

Traditionally, aftercare brings together practices that help both the dominant and his submissive to  gently return to reality after a session.

It is  a parenthesis of intimacy and tenderness where everyone feels soothed and receives the attention they need.

A bit like consent arrived in the BDSM world long before being integrated into more traditional relationships, aftercare is positive for everyone. 🫂

Whether you are involved in a long relationship, in an open couple or rather single juggling between several play partners, the moment following sex is just as important.

Why practice aftercare?

Create a decompression airlock

The suspended moment of aftercare offers a secure space where  partners can relax, calm down and return to a state of tranquility. See it as a nice bridge that connects sex and your daily life. 🌉

Instead of ending abruptly and abruptly returning to your endless to-do list, this moment promotes a feeling of physical and emotional well-being.

Caresses, sweet words and intimacy allow the body to  regain normal physiology and hormone levels to come down at their own pace. 🪷

Strengthen the connection between partners

You've just had a crazy time with your partner to the point where your legs are still shaking. What if we told you that the minutes following seventh heaven are even more precious to nourish the bond with others?

The descent of excitement  makes pillow confessions easier. We talk about what we liked or didn't like in an open and non-judgmental way. This is the perfect opportunity to  share your feelings and preferences , without guilt or reproaches.

Good news: the more you dare to open up, the more  your next meetings will be fiery and satisfactory. 🔥

Getting over the sex blues

You may have never heard of post-coital dysphoria aka sex blues , but you've probably experienced it. You know, that moment right after sex when a great sadness suddenly overcomes us. We can feel depressed and tears sometimes blur our vision.

This is where the superpower of aftercare comes into play! 🪄

This restorative practice allows strong emotions to be expressed healthily. It offers the opportunity to reassure each other, to comfort each other and to feel loved and supported. We thus find ourselves in a caring cocoon , which can greatly contribute to alleviating the negative emotions felt after the sexual act.

Normalize pleasure

After sex, some people may feel embarrassed or guilty. Enjoying is sometimes accompanied by  feelings of discomfort , thanks to centuries of prohibitions and taboos associated with pleasure. Post-sex is therefore not the time to leave Baby in a corner. ❤️

Aftercare plays a crucial role in normalizing pleasure and helping to  deconstruct the stigma and shame associated with enjoyment. By sharing  a bubble of support and acceptance , each partner invites the other to feel safe and comfortable with their own feelings and desires.

This sweet  mix of listening and self-expression is the key to developing a more fulfilling relationship with your sexuality and contributes to greater personal satisfaction. 🙌

What does an aftercare moment look like?

OK, we understand the concept of aftercare, but where to start?  The answer is simple: communicate. 😉

The first step to gently returning to reality is to communicate with others. This can involve words of affirmation about what you liked. Be sure that  your partner's needs are met , then share what  you would like to receive to relax .  Spoiler alert: few people answer “roll over and sleep”.

Then, depending on your mood, you can choose from a wide range of activities.

debrief on the pillow caress oneself kiss follow the flow of the conversation take a shower for two or alone share a snack massage each other stay in your own bubble for a few moments

wrap yourself in a warm blanket: with the endorphins, the temperature goes down do a breathing exercise together get news the next day cuddle up in front of a film or series compliment oneself prepare a hot drink

Aftercare is a fluid practice, the activities it involves can evolve over time or from one appointment to another.

Stay attentive to your desires and those of your partner. You can set up a ritual like improvising new activities each time. You alone decide, provided that each party is consenting of course ! 👏

As you will have understood, aftercare is an essential practice that allows you to take care of yourself and others after sex. By providing a space for relaxation, connection and support, it promotes faster physical and emotional recovery . By integrating aftercare into our sexual practices, we can live experiences that are more enriching, more fulfilling and more respectful for all partners involved. Now that you know about after sex, we invite you to discover how to live it even better. before thanks to the sexual menu. 😘