Manage your money well: an act of self-love
By Aline Arcis
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Managing your money well is much more than just an Excel spreadsheet. The way you organize your finances reflects both your upbringing and your relationship with yourself.
By working on your financial well-being , you're taking care of yourself in the long run. Yes, financial education is self-care! In this article, we've chosen to focus on attachment theory to bring a little more love back into your relationship with money.
A quick disclaimer before you start reading: this article and all the advice on this blog are intended to be educational and should not be considered financial advice. You must consider your personal circumstances. To define a suitable investment strategy, you should consult a qualified financial advisor.
What is attachment theory?
Developed by John Bowlby in the late 1960s, this theory establishes a strong link between the quality of an individual's early relationships, particularly with their parents, and how they will develop their future relationships.
She suggests that childhood emotional attachments greatly influence adult relationships . If you've ever wondered why you always end up with the same type of partner, this theory will likely explain it better than your astrological chart.
To support this hypothesis, Bowlby studied the behavior of children placed in the countryside during World War II.
Today, this theory, initially developed in the context of human relationships, can be applied to your relationship with other areas. At Puissante, we want to apply it to your relationship with money.
Bowlby's theory describes three styles of insecure attachment, which we detail in the following paragraph.
The different types of attachment
Anxious attachment
People with anxious attachment generally have difficulty establishing stable interpersonal relationships . They are often preoccupied with rejection and loss of relationships, which is why they constantly seek approval and reassurance from others.
In terms of money, they have a spendthrift profile. Inability to save, debts, people with anxious attachment frequently make financial decisions that are not in their best interest.
For example, you regularly splurge on your favorite brand or you can't seem to set a limit on your vacation budget. This type of person tends to avoid looking at their bank account because they're afraid of what might be there. As a result, they lack an overview of their incoming and outgoing funds and choose to live in denial.
Talking about budgeting, investing, and even financial literacy can be stressful. Taking the first step with a clear and easy-to-use financial tracking system can help you gradually regain control of your finances.
In this article, we share our best tips for better managing your money.
Ambivalent attachment
Ambivalent attachment could be summarized by the idea that no one can be trusted . This belief translates into the perception of money as something "dirty," "evil," and unreliable.
A person who has experienced this type of attachment needs control over their environment to feel safe.
This can manifest as a tendency to avoid financial risks, to shy away from investments, and to prefer keeping everything under the mattress without enjoying life or making your savings grow. It's your ant on steroids.
To develop a healthier relationship with your money, you can work on easing excessive restraint by setting a realistic budget and learning to treat yourself with sensible purchases. An extra bar of chocolate in your basket or a dinner out with friends isn't a threat to your financial health. We promise!
Disorganized attachment
The last attachment style is a kind of insecure mutant that combines the bad habits of the grasshopper and the ant. It features contradictory and inconsistent behaviors .
For example, they are experts at playing hot and cold in their relationships.
In the area of money, they may experience difficulties managing their money consistently and making informed financial decisions . Impulsive spending or investment behavior, and taking reckless risks as if there were no tomorrow, are also associated with this style.
People with disorganized attachment often need to move forward independently.
Learning basic financial skills can help fill these gaps and develop healthier financial habits. Online courses, books, and workshops on money management are valuable resources for improving your financial literacy and regaining control of your finances.
By working on your emotional attachment, you can develop a healthier relationship with money. Remember that every case is unique and that attachment styles are not fixed or permanent personality traits . Managing your finances well is one of the many components of personal fulfillment. To discover other everyday self-care practices , click here!
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