Regardless of the type of relationship we have with our partner, we tend to believe that if the current is going, our sex life will necessarily be passionate. Spoiler alert : the less we talk about pleasure, the more it tends to wither. When desire is at its peak at the start of a relationship, it's easy to think everything is going effortlessly . However, being silent about our desires can lead to sexual difficulties and stagnation in our intimate life. This article aims to remedy the lack of communication in the couple . Here are our best tips for approaching the subject with kindness and thus putting the odds on your side for a fulfilling sexuality!
Choose the right time to talk about sex in your relationship
Before starting the conversation, it is recommended to find the right time to discuss your sexual desires and preferences.
Between cheese and dessert during a family meal might not be the best time, right? Directly on the pillow after a torrid parenthesis either.
Pick a non-sexual setting and make sure you're both available and relaxed . It can be a quiet Sunday afternoon or a drink one evening. The idea is to open a space of trust where everyone can share what makes them vibrate while respecting others. 🤍
If you wish, you can notify your partner of the intention of the conversation. This is an excellent way to avoid misunderstandings and to promote mutual openness.
Tackle one topic at a time
Yippee, the dialogue is open! Now, it is essential to tackle the most important subject first. Don't bombard your partner with all the information about your need for pleasure, from wanting to incorporate sex toys into your games to fulfilling your wildest fantasies.You could start by sharing a first avenue to explore together . Be sure to give your partner a chance to respond to the proposal. Who knows, he or she will surely have great ideas to make this new experience a success! Active listening is essential to maintain the bond of trust and strengthen your intimate connection. ✨
By taking things one step at a time, you allow your partner to gradually adapt to your desires and feel more comfortable in the discussion.
stay in the positive
The sexual sphere is full of injunctions and taboos . They affect identity, self-confidence, our relationship with others and sometimes even deeper traumas. In short, our way of approaching sex is a reflection of our very personal vision of the world. 🌎
It is therefore difficult to know absolutely how our partner perceives sexuality. This is why talking about sexuality must remain in the positive.
When expressing your desires or concerns, pay attention to your language and the way you phrase your sentences. Avoid blaming or criticizing your partner and instead start from your feelings . Instead of saying, "You don't satisfy me sexually," try, "I'd like to consider new things with you because I want to experience new sensations."
Before discussing the areas you would like to improve, take the time to highlight what works well during your intercourse. Express your gratitude and appreciation for the intimate moments shared.
You can try the “ sandwich of compliments ” method by starting with a compliment, followed by your concern, and ending with another compliment. It's a great technique for maintaining a positive climate and thus avoiding any feeling of personal criticism. 🍔
Keep the communication active
Once you've opened the floodgates to intimate communication, it's up to both people to keep it that way. The goal: to talk about sex with as much fluidity as chatting about your evening meal . Yes it is possible !
Here are some suggestions to encourage this regular communication:
Erotic games 🎲
Erotic games offer a playful and fun approach to exploring your desires and fantasies as a couple. They are mistakenly thought to be limited to love dice and somewhat has-been. Nope, there are now a multitude of brands with more inventive proposals than each other. The game is ideal for opening the conversation with lightness.
The monthly date 📅
Regularly schedule a specific time to discuss your relationship and therefore your sex life. The date can be held once every month or even every quarter. Make it a romantic date where you list what makes you happy in the relationship and offer some ideas for what to do next. This keeps an open dialogue and builds intimacy.
Activity book 📓
You might also consider using an activity book designed specifically for couples. These workbooks offer exercises and questions that promote communication and mutual exploration , helping to deepen your intimacy and discover new facets of your sexuality.
Find creative and engaging ways to discuss your sexuality . By maintaining regular communication on this subject, you will strengthen your emotional and sexual connection. The perfect combo to encourage a fulfilling relationship on all levels! We promise, your pleasure will only be more intense. 😉
You are now equipped with the best tools to talk about sex in your relationship. Remember that sexual communication is an ongoing and evolving process , so feel free to explore new ground and adjust your discussions over time. Listening, open-mindedness and mutual respect are the keys to a fulfilling sexual relationship. Take the time to deepen your mutual understanding and create a space where you can freely express your desires, limits and fantasies. Besides, if you are looking for new horizons to explore with your partner, why not try watching pornography together ? 📼